Choosing the Best Cremation Urn for Your Angel
Choosing the Best Pet Cremation Urn for Your Angel
It hits us at the hardest time. A time when our head is unclear, filled with grief, loss, maybe shock. We usually tend to outlive out pets, but still, when they die, it almost always is a shock. Even if we know it is coming, the depth of pain and loss is what creates the shock. We do not imagine, in advance, what it will feel like.
Wow. What an awful time to have to think of something as basic as a cremation urn. But it is what we must do.
There are many choices of urns out there. My recommendation would be to ask yourself these questions:
* Do I need a temporary or permanent urn?
-You can buy biodegradable urns if you wish to bury your pet soon after, or you can buy a more permanent urn. One that can have the ashes taken out at a much later date (say, if you would like to bury their ashes with you)
* Where will I be placing the urn?
-Decor may seem superficial at a time like this, but you do need the urn to be something that you can look at and find happiness whenever you do.
* What size pet urn will work for me?
-This is one of your basic questions when deciding what is right for you. If you are scattering or dividing up some of the ashes, then you have a bit more leeway in choosing a size. You can always choose larger if you aren’t sure. The basic rule of thumb is 1 lb. = 1 cubic inch of urn space. Each cremation business is a little different, but this estimation should cover all variables. Size has an asthetic element as well. It is absolutely fine to choose the size of the urn based on where you would like to place it and how visible you would like it to be.
* When I think of my little angel, what image comes to mind? (silly, elegant, tiny, happy, graceful?)
-All these options are out there. Browse the internet, visit the pet cemetery, ask your cremation company about pet urns.
* How much money can I afford?
-This is, of course, quite personally up to you. If you cannot afford the most expensive, it does not mean you didn’t love your angel dog/cat. Do not judge yourself by that.
* Do I want a customized urn, or simply an urn that reflects his/her nature?
-Custom urns are made to order, therefore might (not necessarily so) be a bit more pricey. Check around.
* What would other members of the family wish for?
-This loss will affect all of your family (surprisingly, friends as well), so talk to the other members of your family so they can share their input. This might be a good act of closure for the younger members of the family as well.
These are all thing you need to take into consideration before you purchase an urn. As a maker of urns, I have come to understand that it is much more than buying a piece of art, or a box. It is something that has so much more meaning. My own personal experience in creating my urns is that I feel a huge responsibility towards the purchaser, and making sure they are happy, as a pet urn is symbolic of the love they gave to us and we to them.
How to choose a pet urn
I know that when you are experiencing the death of a very loved pet, the thought of how to best remember him or her is not the first thing that comes to your mind. Very often I get customers who still have their pet in the temporary container that they received from the cremation company. (don’t worry, they return the ashes to you in a nice enough container, usually with a lovely card attached or a nice pouch)
You may not be able to think of what to do with your pets ashes right away. This is perfectly normal. The time will come (yes, it will) when you are strong enough again to start to give it some thought. Remember, I create urns for a living, and my dog Peekay, who died almost 5 years ago is still in his original tin from the crematorium. I still cannot bear to create an urn for him. So I absolutely understand how difficult this time of loss can be.
So, when you are ready, ask yourself the following questions:
* Where am I going to place the urn?
* Do I want to keep the collar, tags, toys?
* What most reminds me of him or her?
* How much am I comfortable spending?
These questions will help get you started in your search. Browsing the web will show you many more options than stores will, so you can see what is out there.
Some urns are mass produced, some are hand made. The mass produced urns are usually much more affordable if price is a concern. Hand crafted can take you to a higher price range. Keep that in mind when you are searching. Of course, I want you to purchase an urn from my Pet Urns, but there are some other really great urns out there. For custom ceramic urns you can go to Cheers Pottery. Ann and Jon are wonderful people. Please tell them I sent you.
My main recommendation is to keep in mind your little loved one. You are going to be keeping his or her remains in the urn usually permanently. So, does the purchase you are about to make reflect your pet’s personality? Is it going to bring a smile to your face? Is it going to remind you of the joy and love you shared?
When buying or commissioning a pet urn, this is the most important thing to take into consideration. And feel free to contact me with any questions you may have.
I hope this helps,
When Placing Your Pet’s Ashes in an Urn
Closure. It is such an important part of the healing process. It allows you to start to move on. To focus again on the future and not so much on the past.
When you are putting your pet’s ashes in the urn, it is a good time to focus on closure.
The way to keep this experience positive is to create a ritual around the act.
-Gather up photos, toys, blankets, etc. that remind you of your angel.
-Invite a friend or more to help you.
-Create a temporary alter with things that are important to you.
-Find a wonderful poem, or some words that bring you comfort. If you can write your own, even better!
-Visualize the love you shared. Focus on caring for this last reminder of your angel.
-Focus on celebrating life.
There are many more ideas that you can incorporate into this ritual of putting your pet in it’s final home, his or her special urn. Let it be individual, let it be something that has meaning for you.
If you have any other ideas to share, I would love to hear them!
My Mom’s Urn
my personal urn story…
My dear, sweet mother died of cancer about 10 years ago now. That sounds so long ago compared to what if feels like. Three years sounds more accurate. Somehow, it is not.
I have processed it. And not. I don’t know if I ever will, totally. Sometimes there are small things that bother you. Not important in the large scheme of things, but still…
So I have to get this off my chest. Especially in light of what I do for a living now.
We choose a wonderful urn for her at the funeral home. A marble angel that was just what she would wanted. It fit her personality perfectly, both visually and in spirit. It was very, very expensive.
After the cremation my sisters and I go to the funeral home to receive her ashes. The director comes out and brings us the beautiful urn with my mothers cremains inside. We are heartbroken, we are disoriented, but we are glad to have ‘her’ in our care again. What happened after that was disturbing.
The assistant then hands us a big black plastic box, and says: “here is the rest of her”. It was surreal. We had no idea that the urn we choose would not hold all her remains and they had to put the rest of the ashes into another box. No one told us. No one prepared us. It was a shock to the system, that has remained to this day.
I am not sure why I am sharing this story. I think it just still makes me angry that I did not know. I would not have wanted my mother in that black plastic box, she deserved more, and had we known, we would have given it to her.
My mom loved all things of beauty, she painted, she had horses, she adored being in nature, it was who she ‘was’.
I know the spirit is gone, I know it is just a physical remains. I know it is not a big event. But somehow it insulted the love I have for my mom. My little, cute, adorable mom. Who walked on her tippy toes with her ponytail swinging. Who took me on countless adventures. Who I loved to hug more than anyone. Ever. I just have to say out loud that that little incident made me mad. And now that I have expressed it, I will let it go.
We all need to let go. Sometimes we need to be self expressed first.